Gulfport, MS – Rumors are swirling in coastal towns that gold nuggets, many the size of golf balls or larger, have been discovered just beneath the pure white sands along the Mississippi gulf coast. With the price of gold now hovering around $1200 per ounce the unexpected bonanza, if true, could be real godsend for local residents, many who have been without work since the BP oil disaster. Rumors have it that many local residents have been seen quietly retrieving the gold for over a week now.
Horace P. Petulant, a local real estate agent who manages a myriad of local coastal rental properties, says the gold diggers influx has resulted in a definite uptick in business. “Anyone interested in helping themselves to the gold had better make reservations soon,” he said, “before its are all gone.”
The owner of the popular JackHouse restaurants chain offered up this tasty morsel when he was overheard whispering to someone on this cell phone, “The gold, its just lying there on the beach. All you need is a child’s plastic bucket and shovel. Hurry up!”
Morris Cheatum, owner of Gulf Coast Hardware in nearby Orion, said he still has plenty of metal detectors and other supplies for out of state gold diggers, “But ya’ll better hurry before all the gold’s gone. I ain’t funnin’ ya.” Hundreds of area fisherman have been seen renting out their boats to people wanting to pick up the loose gold nuggets from outlying sand bars. Kathy Janice, mayor of Phillips Inlet, was seen out on beach with a straw hat full of the glistering gold. “You better get here fast,” she was quoted as saying, ‘cause its going fast.”